Setting goals

So I set this goal for myself - I want to be in the absolute best shape of my life by my 40th birthday. I have exactly 10 months to accomplish this; which is totally feasible barring any unforeseen monkey wrenches hurtled my way by the cosmic forces that be. (They love throwing monkey wrenches at me. Sometimes I dodge them - sometimes I take them right in the metaphoric groin.)

I have a history of 'almost' successes. I tend to act on whims that I often grow bored with long before they come to fruition. In 1996 I had this bright idea of becoming a fitness model. I worked my ass off and 'almost' succeeded. Instead of ending up in fitness competitions, I started bar hopping and drinking. I was in amazing shape and pretty much ready to go - I just lost interest in it. Ever since then, I've been trying to tap into whatever motivated me at that time knowing that my attention span is a wee bit longer now that I'm older. Last summer I was knee deep in the P90X program when a cosmic monkey wrench knocked me clean out of the running. I am just now feeling recovered enough from that little misadventure to start all over again. (That's what life is all about right? Fall down, get back up - and do it all again?)

My history makes me a little skeptical of setting goals - so I tend to write my goals in pencil. When I actually manage to accomplish a goal I don't even know how to celebrate. I'm too stunned. I do have a super treat in mind if my 40th birthday rolls around and I'm right where I want to be; I wrote that down in ink. I don't want to fail at this because for me things just seem to be getting better as I get older. My 20's were a barren wasteland of shit and mistakes; learning lessons over and over. My 30's started off rough but then progressively grew into the best decade of my life. If that is any indication of the things to come then I am fully ready to embrace my 40's and live without looking back.

I've started back on P90X - taking it a little slow and easy but still doing it. I have issues with hesitation and fear of failure but so far I've been able to push them off into the back of my mind. I also haven't had any of the physical set-backs that caused my first two attempts at starting back up to fail epically. My first week was a bit rough but this program is not easy and I am really out of shape. (I can't BELIEVE how quickly my body crapped out on me!!!) Once I finish the program, I intend to skate until I can't skate anymore this year (and accomplish that goal of 500 miles) and keep up a workout program at the gym. I sincerely hope that this is not another one of my 'almost' successes....